From the very beginning of life, babies arrive in the world with a deep need for connection. Long before they can speak, walk or even understand words, they are already learning one of the most important lessons of all:
Am I loved? Am I safe? Do I belong?
Love and belonging are not simply “nice extras” in early childhood: they’re essential building blocks for emotional development and good mental health. When babies and young children feel secure, valued and connected to the people around them, they thrive socially, emotionally and cognitively.
Why love and belonging matter so much in early childhood
In the first few years of life, the brain develops at an extraordinary rate. During this period, children are forming their earliest understanding of the world and their place in it.
Research shows that early relationships are not only emotionally meaningful, they are biologically necessary. Early relational health is a foundation for lifelong wellbeing and relationships in the early years are essential for healthy development.
When children experience love and belonging, they develop:
- secure attachments
- confidence and self-worth
- resilience
- strong social skills
- better emotional regulation.
Babies learn through emotional connection. They are incredibly sensitive to the emotional environment around them. Even without language, they can sense:
- tone of voice
- facial expressions
- warmth or emotional distance
- stress or calmness in caregivers.
The Harvard Centre on the Developing Child emphasises the importance of “serve and return” interactions. These are responsive back-and-forth exchanges between a child and a caring adult, which help shape brain architecture and build a foundation for lifelong learning and emotional health.
Every time a baby cries and is comforted, or smiles and receives a smile back, they are learning that they matter, they are safe and they belong.
Belonging means a child feels accepted, included and valued exactly as they are. This emotional safety is the foundation for growth, curiosity and confidence.
Attachment theory, first developed by psychiatrist John Bowlby, explains how strong early bonds with caregivers provide children with a secure base from which they can explore the world.
Children who feel they ‘belong’ are more likely to:
- trust others
- express emotions openly
- build empathy
- cope better with change.
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Creating optimal emotional environments for young children
The good news is that building love and belonging does not require perfection. It just needs consistency, warmth and connection. Here are practical ways families, caregivers and communities can nurture emotionally supportive environments:
1. Respond with warmth and sensitivity
When babies and young children cry, they are communicating. Responsive caregiving helps them feel safe and builds secure attachment.
2. Provide predictability and routine
Young children thrive in environments that feel stable. Simple routines, such as mealtimes, familiar caregivers or bedtime routines, support emotional security.
3. Be positive and present
Children flourish when they feel truly seen through simple acts such as:
- eye contact
- listening
- shared play
- gentle encouragement.
Even short moments of full attention strengthen emotional connection.
4. Recognise and value all emotions
All emotions are valid, even the big ones. When adults respond with empathy and understanding instead of anger or apathy, children learn that feelings are manageable and safe.
5. Create safe boundaries
Recognising and supporting children’s emotions does not mean allowing children to behave badly. Setting boundaries and explaining why they are important are vital steps to helping children communicate their emotions in safe and acceptable ways.
6. Strengthen belonging
Belonging grows not only at home but also in childcare settings, schools and communities. When adults work together to create safe, loving environments, children benefit enormously.
The lifelong impact of early love and belonging
A child who grows up surrounded by love, acceptance and emotional safety carries those lessons forward.
They become adults who are more likely to:
- form healthy relationships
- regulate emotions effectively
- feel confident in themselves
- offer empathy and connection to others.
Love and belonging are not simply childhood needs – they are lifelong protective foundations.
Love is not just an emotion, it’s a developmental necessity. Belonging is not just a feeling, it’s the foundation of wellbeing. When we create environments where babies and young children feel deeply connected and valued, we give them the greatest gift possible:
The belief that they are safe, loved, and worthy of positive connections.
Mandy Edmond is Vice Principal, Head of Enterprise and Strategic Partnerships at Norland.
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